His undulating call to darkness bellows like some underwater incubus

Content,
merely to know the primordial call-
will ever-pierce your whitewashed fog,
your room of trashed men in disheveled fur coats,
your fervent manifestation-
the gestalt reality where you find peace,
shalt be torn asunder by my plea,
to see the shadows of the woman I know to be there meddling in the mists of power she pretends not to control

Lovers searching for her name etched amongst the stones

Thick tendrils of clove smoke,
Forming sealskin oil on my coat and gloves,
A cloud- thick, artificial, and cold,
Like burrowing my face in her tressels of peroxide hair,
Both of us reaching onto the transparent echoes of the children we no longer are.

Heartbeat

My vision stirs as the last breath leaves my chest,
In fear I try to push the crushing weight,
In the Voltaire world where all is for the best,

I try to hope that you are this depressed,
That loneliness may humble out the great,
My vision stirs as the last breath leaves my chest,

It seems I'm now the things I did detest,
Insecure- and a fool who took the bait,
In the Voltaire world where all is for the best,

This noxious pain drains me of my rest,
And bile curdles organs filled with hate,
My vision stirs as the last breath leaves my chest,

The bitter pith remains without the zest,
Sardonic mocking of a future date,
In the Voltaire world where all is for the best,

Despite the ruin some might say I'm blessed,
To have every manner of love just dissipate,
My vision stirs as the last breath leaves my chest,
In the Voltaire world where all is for the best.

5am

Only after a listless night in the dark,
do the muted colors of dawn,
burn like fire across the horizon

It comes for us all

The skin that once was coveted hangs from four untouched limbs,
the voice that warbled cheerily
no longer sings those hymns,

the breaths that drew in heavy
have not their lines of white,
the eyes that closed so sweetly
bleed and yellow through the night

the heart that cherished magic
seems to shrink beneath the bone,
the soul that once reached out to you
is dying here alone

Ideation

Pushing myself further
against the black precipice of death
is the only thing that still makes this weary heart beat faster
in the soul-shattering absence of your love

Damned

A sea of ruddy ichor,
Rust-colored and putrid,
Brushes over ankle-deep,
Melting the flesh, fusing toes,

A cloud of acrid miasma,
Greasy black and gunpowder gray,
Impales the sinner's lips,
Smashing through teeth, ripping roots,

A plague of pus and boils,
Eschar clinging to unhealing wounds,
Speads across my heart,
Rotting through chambers, seeking death

Kai

If I could explain the pain and the bliss,
Of spitting ash from my mouth from your nitrogen kiss,
Of the aches in my bones when we've just parted ways,
Of the swaying of trees that could entrance me for days,

If I could give you a taste of the splinters,
That pierce my heart and my eye in the darkest of winters,
That whisper thoughts of the dead in the earth with the roses,
That show the strings leading men and the danger each poses,

If I could drown you in the depths of this mire,
This palace of heartache and brimstone and fire,
This begotten island so lonely and pale,
These colors seen only by beings so frail

If I could sincerely ask you to die,
To take both our lives to return to the sky,
To return to the dewdrops, return to the frost,
To become something with meaning in something so lost.

The terms and conditions contract of a Dancer's fickle love

I would drink any liquid that could drown out the voices,
I would shoot up these veins just to live with my choices,
I would smoke any base that could make a bass louder,
I would snort up oblivion if it came in a powder.
I would search for the dose that felt just like your kissing,
But I blew past that point and still hurt from what's missing.

Irregular heartbeat for over an hour

I would never begrudge that you don't know this feeling,
when I cannot express it without barriers peeling,

I would never expect you to size up this burden,
To stop with your walls and get a last honest word in,

But maybe I wouldn't have pushed till I'm dying,
If sooner I'd seen any chance of you trying.

Wedding Planner

I used to reach for the strength of your hand,
Thought myself saved by a king with his fearsome command,
Saw those green eyes reflect just a touch of blue roses,
Misunderstanding the vision of blue-cheeked overdoses,
A perpesctive askewed by Piscean confusion,
We've been drowning each other in deepest delusion.

Union Pacific

Ribbed in iron,
clad in silver,
crowned in gold-
the false bind of ties for them all to behold,
the success, ornamental, like rust spreading on tin,
while mercury oxide fills the chambers within,
while it bubbles and leaches to brain and to bone,
how else could I handle that I'm always alone?
The despair in this wormed-heart of impending disaster,
Is placated each time that my mind's damaged faster,
At the thrill of the notion that this pain may be ending,
I can't hide from my sins and I can't keep pretending.